The Evolution of My Soul

The Evolution of My Soul

To become greater than yourself you have to become more than what you think you were. Who are we really?

My flesh lives in fear although my soul simultaneously lives in hope. Entrapped by social fears and financial restraint, I am free to do anything.

Beauty within reach yet so far away. I am in love, but self loathe. I feel uneasy in my own skin. Pain curbs my will and my flesh steals my might. I want to be free, to feel at one.

I proclaim I am clear minded and worry free, yet I ponder after every interaction “am I good enough” “could I do better” for the world, other people, myself and for this life?!

I question myself. Am I trying too hard to fit in? Is it wrong to be better than I was yesterday, to question myself, my motivations and morals? To be more than I was?

Broken throughout time, and yet unjustifiably pieced together with it, I believe there is more to just existing.

Unequivocally irreversibly enlightened. I have more layers than the proverbial onion. Try peeling them back, you may well cry.

My soul yearns for more. I am stuck within four walls and a shell. My body, my home. Life.

Like a caterpillar I await transcendence within my cocoon. I am just waiting to fly.

ML MALTA 2020

Still There

I’m still here. I am lost within myself, but I am still here. I cannot express my truth, but I am still here.

I cannot recall things or people, but I am still here. I cannot be independent and my body doesn’t listen, but I am still here.

I am not the person I was or that you remember, but I am still here. I feel as though I am not me anymore, but I know, am still here.

I forget, yet I am not to be forgotten. I still feel and see, touch and breathe. My words and actions do not make sense to you or to me, but I’m still here.

Please do not forget me while I’m trapped within my walls. I am still here.


– ML Malta

Learning to Fly

“I’m very grateful for the way life has turned around. That bad people don’t stay and that good ones do. Though it has never been easy, I’m grateful for the life lessons, wisdom and understanding that comes from falling, because without it I would never have learnt to fly.” – ML Malta

Please stop judging me.

Please stop judging me.

We all make mistakes, especially when we’re in pain. You are more than the sum of a few stupid decisions. You are more than your mistakes. If people judge you by them, they really don’t know you. Your character should stand out and shine above the petty things. People will never know your truth, and who cares? Why should they? They certainly don’t need to! Who’s business is it to judge? I’m sure they’re not perfect. So why worry ourselves and destroy your own value and self worth because we’re so busy worrying about what other people think of us. Why worry about something we can’t change?! Move on.

People will never know what you’ve lived through. How hurt you’ve been, who, or how many hurt you, when, where or how long or often?! People will judge us on our moment’s of failure, but that failure isn’t an end, it’s a lesson. We grow, we learn and we mature. We’re constantly moving forward and developing. Don’t let the opinions of other’s – past or present, stop you from living your best life. You’re more than the opinions of sheep. We can’t allow pitfalls to leave us in the pit. You have to get up, shake off the dirt and get back on track. Forgive your naivety.

Start growing up and moving on with life. Life is with the living, the past is dead and buried. It is about time we heal. Leave it where it belongs – in the past. Take the lesson and forget the rest. Life is really too short to stress about silly mistakes. Please don’t waste another moment of your precious life harming yourself for being human.

You deserve to treat yourself with all the love and respect in the world. Follow your dreams and passion. Help people. Be kind to yourself and other’s. It is a start, and it definitely won’t be the end of a great life. Enjoy it. It’s your time to shine.

– ML Malta

Future.

Future. I look to you hoping to see something new. To see a version of myself that would be appealing and attainable. In the microseconds of every day I see you becoming no more than yesterday. I cannot move beyond myself and these walls, yet, there is progress. There is more! A balance between what was, is, and what will be. Carefully orchestrated beyond my reach and significantly within and out of my control. What a whirlwind you are? Oh creation, a mystery and a mastery; not to be put under the microscope.

ML Malta